BOOK REVIEW: The Love You Deserve (2023)

• By Adex Suleiman,
  Independent Cultural Critic | Arts & Culture Commentary

Introduction

In The Love You Deserve: Rewriting Your Story One Choice at a Time (2023), Mayowa-David Oluwatosin Risikat delivers a powerful intervention in modern relationship literature. Far from being just another self-help manual, this book is an act of cultural healing, rooted in the author’s unique blend of psychology, spirituality, and narrative clarity.

Breaking the Myths of Toxic Love

The book takes direct aim at the cycles of self-abandonment, trauma bonding, and low self-worth that dominate so many people’s experience of relationships. What makes it distinct is its interactive design—with tools such as the Relational Timeline Audit and affirmations like “I choose to rewrite my story—one conscious decision at a time.”

Risikat writes with the warmth of a mentor and the authority of a coach, guiding readers through the inner work required to break patterns and reclaim the dignity of love.

Psychological Depth Meets Accessibility

What sets this book apart is the author’s ability to translate complex psychological theories—from attachment dynamics to trauma responses—into digestible and compassionate guidance.

The brilliance lies in how these insights are framed within a universal, culturally accessible narrative, making the work resonate across Africa and beyond.

Critique: While some academically inclined readers may wish for more references to global scholarship, the book’s approachable tone is its strength. By avoiding elitist language, Risikat democratizes healing and makes it available to everyone.

Contribution to Arts and Culture

Expands the Canon: Adds an African voice to global conversations on relationships and self-worth.

Blends Disciplines: Marries psychology, spirituality, and cultural storytelling into one accessible framework.

Affirms Identity: Positions love not as a fix but as a choice rooted in agency and dignity, reshaping cultural narratives around self-worth.

Final Reflection

The Love You Deserve is not just about finding healthier relationships—it is about redefining love as an act of artistry and agency. By empowering readers to rewrite their stories, Risikat offers a text that is at once personal, cultural, and global.

💡 Key Takeaway: Love isn’t meant to fix you—it is a conscious choice that begins with reclaiming your worth.